Monday, December 5, 2011

Hold Me

I long to be held

I was never held cept for when I was a child

My pop pop skeet would hold me for hours

I was a mere child, bout 7 I suppose when he showed me held love

Placed upon his knee, giddy cuz my pop pop loved me

He was a powerful and strong man in nature though not in stature

But it didn't matter cuz to a child (me) he was everything needed

But he's gone now and I miss him so much, even my own father, his son never held me. Never said he loved me. I was never the love of his life like I was of my pop pops, his father I wish u were still here pop pop to hold me again. to show me that love I have never in my lifetime experienced. I just wish someone would hold me (like pop pop) for old time’s sake...

How did I get here?

Back into this state of unsaving grace?

It hurts so badly.

Raw with emotion

I'm 6 again

I'm 7, 8, and 9,10,11,12

Cold, confused, misused

Beggar of Please

Screamer of why me

As I turn the pages of my diary

My best friend,

My minds savior

Inking truths one after another

Dreams, desires, fictional satires

Am I asleep?

Just a moment ago I was happy

I was happy

I was HAPPY damnit

Stop happening upon me

Leave me alone

I got rid of you long ago

Stop wreaking havoc on my fragile soul

I'm 6

I'm 7, 8, and 9,10,11,12

Hold me please.